


The Hush

by Val_Creative



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Best Friends, Multi, Suicide, Tragedy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-01
Updated: 2015-09-01
Packaged: 2018-04-18 11:05:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 441
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4703738
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Val_Creative/pseuds/Val_Creative
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There’s no blood, and seemingly no injury. Yet, Merlin lies there, getting weaker by the moment, his skin visibly damp and porridge-coloured.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Hush

**Author's Note:**

> Requested by merlins-earmuffs: "Arthur and Gwen finally manage to have a baby after years of trying, only to discover that Merlin gave his life for a new one to be made. POV Arthur, make of it what you will."
> 
> DEANONING FOR MERLICFICDRIVETHRU AS FIC'S AUTHOR!

*

When Guinevere begins to show, glowing with happiness and a new life inside her, it’s the first time Merlin collapses, eyes rolling up to the back of his skull. 

His body seizes violently, thrashing and caught by Leon’s steadying arms. “Lower him gently,” Gaius instructs, the court murmuring behind him. “We must wait until it passes. Then I need him moved to his bed.”

Arthur feels his wife’s hand slip into his, and it singles his focus. 

He felt the urge as well to rush to Merlin, to call to him and wake him, but getting into Gaius’ way would have hurt more than helped Merlin.

*

There’s no blood, and seemingly no injury. Yet, Merlin lies there, getting weaker by the moment, his skin visibly damp and porridge-coloured.

“If you don’t tell him, I will, Merlin,” Gaius announces, holding a cloth to Merlin’s forehead. He frowns down as his ward as Merlin coughs, lungs rattling.

“Merlin, what is he talking about?” Arthur asks, expression darkening.

“You have a heir now,” Merlin tells him, smiling that  _annoying_  smile, his voice hoarse. “You should be taking care of Gwen.”

“Gwen is in perfect health –  _you_  are not.” Arthur’s eyebrows bunch together. His stomach curdles. “Did you do this? With your magic?” he asks. At Merlin’s smile fading around the edges, Arthur backs away. “ _You did._ ”

“ _Arthur_ –”

Merlin’s clammy fingers graze Arthur’s hand, and he jerks away, stomping out of Gaius’ workshop, jaw tightening as Merlin’s yells turns to a fit of coughing.

*

Seven months. Seven months of Merlin treading even closer to his death.

He can no longer carry the king’s armour, or training practice with the men, let alone walk across a chamber-room for a drink of water or hold the goblet.

Arthur cannot lie or keep truths from his queen. Guinevere is distraught, feeling guiltier than anyone, even as both he and Merlin insist it is not her doing. She wants to be at Merlin’s side, caring for him, but fears what would happen.

“Isn’t there something you can do?” Arthur murmurs, watching the other man swallow with some difficulty, groaning softly. Talking is even a burden.

“ _Life for a life_ ,” Merlin says, blinking slow, “ _the balance needs to be met_.”

*

Weeks. 

Somewhere in the castle, Guinevere is already in labour and attended by midwives and serving girls, encouraging her through his son’s birth.

Merlin is  _dying_.

Arthur sits by himself on a bench. The light of morning peeking in the armoury. His leather-gloved hands turning over Excalibur round, round, and round. 

Heart pounding so loudly.

“Life for a life,” he repeats, grimly.

*

And the hush is deafening in Merlin’s ears. 

*


End file.
